It feels like my mind is waking up after being in a fog in the past three + years. Memories I'd buried get triggered by things that happen in everyday life. They're good memories, and they're helping to make the hard ones easier to take. One thing that I am so glad of and thankful to God for is that He gave me the strength not just to stand beside my husband, but to LOVE HIM THROUGH this whole battle he fought. And another thing I am so thankful is the soft place that our families and friends provided for us to land.
I heard this song on the radio today. Yes, it made me cry. It'll probably make you cry too. But it's a good song. The chorus tells so well how I felt toward Jim. I only wish I'd been able to say it to him so eloquently. And the verses tell how we both felt and I still feel about you... the ones who loved us through it while it was happening, and still love us even now.
Get your tissues ready.
You did love Jim through it...and beyond it. The way you are honoring the life of the husband who loved you well is a beautiful thing to see. Even the difficult burden I would love to take from you: grieving him. The tears, the difficult nights, the days you give to Marley when you are spent are all part of that. I hope you can someday look back and see what I see. A wife, a mother, a friend loving forever an incredible man.
ReplyDelete"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning." Your joy is coming, Megan. And Jim's memory and love will be a blessed part of that.